i´m using nocheat as a client...
the server config was generated by the TNG config generator.
if i start the a non-dedicated server this problem doesn´t happen...

-edit: i did more research: i started nocheat.exe and started a non_dedicated server using my config. had no lag. then i did an alt+tab and startet nocheat again as a second client. there the lag appears (besides the low fps from using 2x nocheat.exe). it seems that i can run only one instance of quake2... i would start a dedicated i wouldn´t be able to join from the same computer.